It seems I never want to do anything but sleep these days. I spend my waking hours being sleepy, and at night when I go to bed, I can't sleep because I've come to the point where there is no comfortable position for a woman with a human being living in her belly. Of course this could explain why I'm sleepy all day.

And then today arrived a mattress overlay Mike and I got as our Christmas gift to each other. It is heaven's gift to pregnant-kind. Mike unpacked it and couldn't get up for 30 minutes. I joined him somewhere in his 15th minutes and promptly fell asleep. Even if Desi was tumbling all over me. Now my productivity will plunge from 13% to negative seven thousand.

I've been meaning to write about my pregnancy for many weeks now. Many nights I go to bed composing an entry in my head, which I intend to write up the next day but never do, because there are endless things to read on Facebook, and it's so much easier to just say "hates pregnancy zits!" on Twitter. I swear microblogging has pretty much killed this blog. Unless I have a really long thought that won't get out of my head until I write about it, an actual event I want to share, or a photo to post.

I rarely, if ever, post pregnant pics. Which is why I admire Dooce for posting a pic every month, with her belly exposed. My belly is a wrinkly mess of stretch mark stripes and too horrific to post on the internet, even without the pregnancy zits. But I figured, this photo turned out ok. And look, I'm not the only pregnant person in it!

This is Camille, I believe I mentioned her wedding earlier this year. Anyway, they lost no time and conceived just days after getting married. The photo was taken just two days ago during our brand new inaanak's baptism. I'm at 18 weeks, and Camille is probably a week or two ahead of me. We're both due in April and share the same OB. If my baby is a boy like her's, they will inevitably be dubbed the April Boys.

Poor things. The odds are against them even before birth.

They say with every pregnancy the mother gets larger and larger. I remember in my first pregnancy, not really showing until maybe 22 weeks? And Desi was, for me obviously bigger and heavier than Lia was. This is even bigger. But look at that photo! It's Camille's first pregnancy and she's much bigger than me I guess it's really in the genes. Thanks Mom! I'm thin while pregnant just like you.

Another reason I don't feel as compelled to write about this pregnancy as I did with Lia, or even, I guess with Desi, is because it seems all the complaints are the same. Pwet-ache, hilo, super smelling, zits, etc etc etc, and all to a lesser degree. This is my first pregnancy where I'm not working in an office and I'm not as tired or stressed, my morning sickness significantly decreased after the first trimester (I used to have morning all day sickness all through out the pregnancy). I feel healthier and stronger. Generally. I still feel faint in church, so I sit through out the mass. I also can't shop for more than an hour or two cause I tire easily. But that's pretty much it. Can't really complain.

Oh except for one thing.

My boobs haven't grown! And I consider this a personal tragedy. I remember with both my first two pregnancies I've had to buy new bras because I jumped up a cup size, even within my first trimester. I'm smack in the middle of my second trimester and I haven't even started using bra extenders! Ok, given that the baseline this time is smaller than ever before (sadly, after breastfeeding, my boobs tend to shrink back to even smaller than pre-pregnancy. My bra size was bigger in college.) but still. It isn't fair! The only thing I look forward to when I'm pregnant is the cleavage and all my blouses fitting better around the rack. But my belly has already overtaken and now what's the point? I'm sure they'll grow again when I breastfeed again, but then they'll be hard and painful and I can't wear pretty bras, only yucky nursing bras so it really isn't the same. Ah. The price for happy, healthy children, we mothers literally pay for with our bodies. By the time I'm done nursing this one, I'll be so flat you can use my chest as an ironing board.

And now to end on a positive note. I shall now return to bed to make sweet sweet love with the mattress overlay that gives me no back pains at all whatsoever. Hello my second nap of the day. Hooray!

Yay it's over! I can finally stop worrying about it. And get on with other goings on in my life. Yesterday we celebrated Nanu's 80th Birthday! It was a bit of an undertaking. Not really as complicated as other events I've organized, but it had it's unique challenges. Funny how, while I'm really glad it's over, I also have to admit to myself that I enjoyed organizing that party. It was really quite fun. And highly satisfying. Especially now that it's over.

If you've been reading this blog for more than two years, or, if you're like Tita Anette who started recently but read everything from the beginning (the thought still amazes me), you would know that parties like these are a matter of course. Two years ago we threw Nana a surprise 80th birthday party. Which is one in a long line of Mantaring Family bashes that include any or all of the following: costumes, singing, dancing, a complicated music video, and general making fools of ourselves in front of relatives and friends. At Nana's party, the Uncles and Aunts generation exempted themselves from the "making fools of ourselves" part and delegated that to us, the Cousins generation. And I, being the eldest cousin, had no choice but to be overall coordinator of the production number.

I guess they were impressed at how I managed to pull that off, 14 cousins, one in the States that had to be videoed beforehand, plus one cousin-in-law (Mike) and one great grand child (Lia) into a cohesive number, that this year, for Nanu, they made me in charge of coordinating the whole party. Great. And technically I've been preparing for this since June, but so many things got in the way, it was almost de ja vu. Another cousin was leaving for the States and I had to video her before she left. I got pregnant. Plus a whole lot of life got in the way. We moved, there was the storm, my sister-in-law gave birth, etc etc etc. I really didn't feel as on top of things as I like to be with this event. I started getting my act together, October na! Less than two months before the party, and there weren't any invitations yet! But then again, it took us a month and a half to organize my whole wedding, so I guess an 80th birthday with 143 guests can't be considered much of a feat. Hahaha!

The difficult thing about organizing a family party is that it's a FAMILY party. You can't really just say, Mom, do this, Tito, do that. I can do that to my siblings, and my cousins, theoretically, as long as none of the things I ask get in the way of, you know, their LIFE. But on the whole, I feel I have to be a little more sensitive about assigning tasks to relatives. Especially relatives I've been taught all my life to follow and obey.

The fun and easy thing about organizing a family party is that it's THIS FAMILY. As I've mentioned before, the Mantarings are never happier than when they're showing off on stage. Geez! And even my uncles, who have pre-exempted themselves from performing, suddenly volunteered to sing when the decision was made to do Frank Sinatra songs. There's never any Sige na! Kanta ka na! or anything like that. My cousins generally don't have any suggestions on what they want to do for the show, but once the decision is made, everyone just does their best. Yes, even the shy ones, even the ones with two left feet and no singing talent. And there are, like two or three. Haha! Isa na ako sa no singing talent. Which is why I stick to dancing. Pero siyempre dinadaan sa charm. At Hello. These performances don't have to be perfect. After all, hindi naman nagbayad yung guests para makita kami sumayaw at kumanta diba? At sila ba may mga apong nagga-ganito? I don't think so. So there.

As it was, we are a whole clan of crammers. So even with just three weeks to put together a show and iron out the details of the party, everyone jumped in and did their part, spent sleepless nights on their assignments, even coming up with last minute contributions, like a whole original song composition and MTV, giveaways, etc. And even if we were never able to gather EVERYONE for a whole complete run through of the program, and even though the party was right on top of yesterday's Manny Pacquiao fight, it was a lot of fun and a smashing success. If I do say so myself. Not only in organization and entertainment value, but also in the amount we raised for the charity Nanu chose to give all his gifts to.

On the whole I think it was a smashing great party because it made Nanu happy. He didn't want to push through with the party anymore, because he felt it wasn't right to spend so much on a celebration when so many people lost so much during Ondoy. And now I know this solidarity thing is hereditary because I know I often feel that way. Spending on parties seems so frivolous sometimes. But we had to push through with the party because if any grandfather deserved an 80th birthday extravaganza, it has to be my Nanu. Who is STILL the active head of his company, jets around the country and the world like it's routine, texts me on my birthday, emails regularly, and has a Facebook account. Also, my Tito already made the downpayment on the venue and that's not refundable. Hehe. I'm sure he's glad we pushed through with it, because he got to see a lot of old friends and relatives, plus his friends all came through for him and we were able to give a significant amount to the beneficiary church, one among the hardest hit by Ondoy in Quezon City.

Oh! Oh! And special added bonus! My children actually danced! While the boys sang Frank Sinatra songs, us girls (the few that are left) danced Nobody by the Wonder Girls. And Lia danced the whole thing! Mostly ignoring our authentic Wonder Girls dance steps and doing her own kindergarten steps. And Desi! I'm just happy she didn't jump off the stage! She just stood there in front of us. She did a few finger wags and claps and points, and then she just stood there, perplexed and sleepy until the song ended. I am beyond proud! I've been telling Lia for weeks now, that she has to dance at our 50th Wedding Anniversary. And she said, OK. Yay!

Ashushwal, I have no photos. I had to be on top of everything, AND acted as videographer so I had no time to take any pictures AT ALL. I'm hoping my aunts took some, but I'll have to wait for them to upload on their multiply sites. And we had an official photographer. Sosyal, Eddieboy Escudero. He did our wedding, and he's the funnest photographer I know. I guess it helps we're related to him. Anyway, we will have to wait for his photos too. I have a few videos but they still have to be converted. And also they feature Mike singing and me dancing, so that's not really fit for internet consumption. So, sorry Tina and Carlo, photos will just have to wait. For now, this is my Nanu when he was in college. Wasn't he pogi? They rarely make men like they used to. Happy Birthday Nanu! I'm so proud to be your granddaughter.

November 23, 2009

EDIT! Official photos are up! See them on Facebook here: Eddie Boy Escudero

And on Multiply here: Eddie Boy Escudero

Today was Lia's third first day of school.

The first first day of school was back in June when she started in her Old School and we still lived in Makati. The second first day was last month when we chose a New School now that we're in Merville. They put her in the Nursery Class because this was the age group she is part of. After a few days, the teacher conducted a baseline assessment to see how far along Lia is developmentally. I guess she noticed that Lia was a little bit ahead of her classmates so she used to Kinder assessment tool and found that Lia already knows most of the things the Kinder kids are supposed to learn. She then told me that she proposed to the school that Lia be accelerated to the Junior Kinder class in the beginning of the second semester, which starts in November.

While I'm really proud that Lia is smart enough to get accelerated, I had a few reservations about this decision. One is that the kids in the Junior Kinder class seem so much bigger than her. I was afraid their size would intimidate her and she would be too shy to make new friends. Another was that, although she can already read, I thought perhaps the kids in the Kinder class are expected to already know how to write, color and draw, and when we started in the Old School, she didn't know how to do these things yet. So I asked for a meeting with her teacher so we can discuss her acceleration, and she showed me her assessment. While the Nursery kids are still learning which letters are which, Lia can already read big words (no surprise there. she can read whole books). The Nursery kids are still learning what are the colors and shapes, and Lia had mastered all these years ago, including unusual shapes like Hexagon and Octagon. They noticed also that sometimes she wasn't listening to the teacher anymore and would just stare at the signs on the wall and read them.

The teacher also showed me that Lia can indeed write her name LIA, can draw simple figures like a diamond and a cross, and if presented with a shape in dotted lines, she can adequately trace it with a pencil. Of all the the skills that Kinder kids are expected to learn, Lia can do more than 80% so clearly, even if she's the same size and age as the kids in Nursery class, developmentally, she doesn't belong there anymore.

I expressed my concern about her ability to socialize so the teachers allowed Lia to sit in with the Junior Kinder class for about 30 minutes one day to see how she does, and while she didn't exactly start making friends right away, she wasn't distressed or nervous, she barely noticed I was there observing, and she confidently explored the new classroom in her typical serious fun way. I noticed also the the kids in the Junior Kinder class, while most were bigger, they were more like Lia in that they talk A LOT, they sing along with the teacher, and they open books to read on their own. It seems I really had nothing to worry about, and I agreed to let her be accelerated beginning November.

Today I sat in with Lia in her third first day of school and just as i the first two first days, she virtually ignored my presence in the classroom. She quietly did everything the teacher asked (including smile and wave at your new classmates). She wrote her own name on her activity sheet without help (some of other kids needed a guide) and ate all her snacks. She was still a bit slow in the songs that everyone else already knew, and she needed help in coloring, but on the whole I think she had fun. When her Nursery teacher saw her in the common room and asked her how her new class was, she offhandedly said, "Oh, it's easy," Talaga naman. Mana kay Lolo Dan.

It's the first class she's in that's more than 10 kids, and the first class where she's not noticeably smarter than everyone else. To me, she seemed small and a little bit lost in the sea of noisy NOISY children (today's class convinced me that I CANNOT be a preschool teacher), and as a mom, I want her to always be the BEST in her class. But hopefully being with them challenges her to shine and be even better than she is now. I don't think there's anything those other kids can do that she can't, except maybe beat them up, which doesn't count. So here's hoping we made the right decision.

And knowing Lia, she's just going to come up with new ways to impress us, every step of the way.

Dear Desi,

It would seem that I am remiss that your every other month letter is one month late. But this was not because I forgot, not even (primarily) because I was busy. I was busy. Very busy. But that wasn't the main reason your letter is late. The reason is because we didn't have internet until about two weeks ago, and I figured, since I also inadvertently skipped Ate Lia's 18th month letter, why not make it a sort of tradition and write to you on your 19th? This is all a big coincidence of course. But for the sake of fairness, it works.

The reason we didn't have internet has very little to do with you or how you've grown, but perhaps it would be good to write about it to you anyway, so you would have an idea of how things were when you were this age. We moved to our house in Merville just 7 days before you turned on 18 months. That entire week was spent packing and moving and unpacking and fetching things that were left behind. But the house was pretty much presentable by October 26. However, on October 27, Metro Manila was besieged by the most devastating typhoon we've had in decades and most of the city was submerged in flood. To this day, one month later, people, no, entire cities are still reeling from the effects of Typhoon Ondoy, as several more storms came and ravaged the country almost every week after that.

So you see, I did want to write you an 18th month letter, even without broadband internet in the house, I thought I could use Daddy's Smart Bro to at least write about how much you've grown. I might not have been able to edit and upload any pictures, but at least your letters were on time. However, as the devastation became apparent, and thousands of people lost their homes and loved ones to the disaster, it seemed incongruous to the times to tell the world what a lovely, beautiful child you've grown to be, and how proud I am of everything that you are. So Mommy busied herself trying to help the victims in whatever way she can, and promised you I would write you when you reached 19 months. And here you are.



I must say, Desi, that you seem to have made the most of the past three months, in terms of growing up and learning things. Actually, many of the new things you are able to do are recent developments. I can't help but think that you took to moving to Merville really well, not only because you seem so happy to have so much space to run around in, and rooms to enter and exit, you've also started to do and know things that you've never seemed inclined to show before.

Before we moved, it was already apparent how much you love books. You love to say Boo! and sign "book" until I pick one out and read it to you. Or, you would pick out a book yourself, bring it to me, and then grab my hand and make my fingers point to the words, as if to say, read! Read! This made me very happy and proud, because both your Daddy and I, and you Ate as well, love reading very much, and that you would show an interest even before you've learned your letters filled my heart with joy. So we would spend countless afternoons reading Dr. Seuss's Alphabet over and over again.



Before long I noticed you started to recognize certain letters. The first letter you seem to have learned was O. You would silently listen as I read you an alphabet book, and when we reach the page after N, you would yell O! You have no idea how cute this was! Later on it was obvious you've learned A and B (although for B you didn't say bee, you said buh), you skipped C and knew D and E. And then M. And most recently, G. This random knowing of the alphabet is so fascinating to me because I've never seen anything like it before. And it is very very exciting.

And then just today, you impressed Tita Michelle that apparently, you also know your numbers! She would show you flash cards and you know most of the numbers already. Sure, you say Wa for 1, and Tee for 3, and Bebe for seven, but it cannot be denied that you can identify the letters. I had a clue you already knew them because in Katipunan last Sunday you pointed to a rubber tile and yelled EIT!!! Sure enough, the number eight. You are definitely a smart smart baby girl.

You also know your animals. You can sign Dog, and when you see a cat, you say MIAOW! When you see a cow you say MOO! You know the body parts, not only to point at but to name. You like to snuggle with me up close in bed, point to my eyes and say "Ah!" Point to my nose and say "No!" My mouth and you say "Ma!" My ears, you say "Ee!" and then you would pat my head and say "Heh!" And then I would ask you, where's your pusud? At which you would smile and then curl up in a ball to cover your tummy cause you know I will tickle your belly button. You never resist too hard though. I know you enjoy the tickling too.



I guess you've started to learn so much more now that we live in Merville because of the big change in your daily routine. Where we used to just stay home all day, either playing in Mommy's room or in Lola's house, basically wherever Yaya brings you, now you have more freedom to move around and be active. You wake up very early each morning, so you and Yaya and Lola Cora usually go to the park for a morning stroll before breakfast. After breakfast, we watch a little TV, take a shower, and then have a nap. when you wake up we have lunch, and then play with Mommy. Later in the afternoon, after Ate had woken from her afternoon nap, it's back to the park for you and Ate and Lola. So, since we've moved, you've been getting a lot of exercise, seeing a lot of new things, and moving around much more. It is infinitely better than being cooped up inside the house, especially since you're such an active baby, and so brave and daring. Our new home has really been a blessing for you.

These days I tend to hug and kiss and baby you so much more than before. Your baby cousin lives with us now, and you seem to be aware that you are no longer the youngest. At first you seemed extra malambing to me and your Yaya Fe (whom you call Aya) but soon I think you realized that the new baby is not your Mommy's baby. I want to reassure you that I love you and will always be my baby, even if soon after you turn two years old, you will have a younger brother or sister, and he or she will definitely be Mommy's baby. My dear, darling Desi, you will never be replaced, you will always be my baby, even when you're old and graying, I don't think I will see you as anything else. Be that as it may, I know that when the new baby comes, I won't be able to spend as much time with you, reading and playing puzzles on the iPhone, or just cuddling in bed and watching TV. So I'm doing my best to hug and kiss and spend one on one time with you as much as I can before that happens.





I'm sorry that you don't have a lot of photos with this letter. Mommy was too busy to take many, and also we lost several pictures when we upgraded to a new computer. However, I think the few that were left show how lovely you are growing to be. I hope they make up for the lost photos.



I love you so much, forever and ever,

Mommy

 I still don't have broadband internet. Mike suspects it's because the person in charge of doing that is in Marikina, digging his house out of the mud. Which is a thought that reminds me I have very little to complain about and a lot to be thankful for. Like our (we suspect) across the street neighbor whose WiFi network is unsecured. The signal is very weak and there are days when they turn it off completely, but hey, it's there, it's free, it allows me to check my email every couple of days or so, and finally now, I've gotten myself to write an entry.

It can't be long though. This moochy neighbor wifi is a bit moody. It comes and goes. So if I want to make sure this goes up tonight, I'd better finish quick.

First, I wrote a few more random thoughts about moving, about the stuff you find, and the things I miss, but when the storm hit before I was able to upload it, everything I wrote just sounded trite and insensitive. So maybe I'll post that later on, when the rest of us aren't reeling anymore. Our storm experience was relatively uneventful. We moved to a section of Merville that was unaffected by the flood (thank God!). The worst that happened was Mike was stranded in Batangas. But he was able to check in to a hotel and he had a good friend with him (Hi Jogo!) so it wasn't so bad.

I felt bad that I had given away so many things before we moved, but somehow, I was able to rummage for more stuff to give away after storm. I wished I were in college again, when packing relief goods was something I volunteered to do practically every year. But as much as I wanted to help, I also couldn't bring myself to leave my kids and the help alone in the new house unsupervised. We don't have a landline yet either so I felt I needed to be home in case of a new emergency. Not to mention this pregnancy thing is totally killing my stamina. Can't even shop for a decent two hours. How can I expect myself to go through mounds of canned goods? So I just did what little I could. And I intend to keep giving.

In other news, it seems Mike's high school friends have started reading this blog. Hi Jogo, Herbie, Kelly and Kat! Thanks Leslie for pointing them this way. Now whatever I write about Mike creeps into their conversations. It seems whatever I call Mike on this blog is what his friends will start calling him in life. I still haven't decided what I will do with this power. Hmm... Marital peace or personal amusement? Such a difficult dilemma. If only Mike's friends' wives had blogs too. Hahaha!

Oh no, the moochy internet is dying on me! I wanted to write more but I have to upload this now or it may be lost to the internetherworld forever. Darn.